Dark dark day

There are days in your life where you just wish you didn't wake up. On those days you struggle to get yourself out of bed. You're weak and have no strength or wish to move. But life goes on so you try to get yourself on track. But no matter what you do, you just can't.
Today was one of those days. I woke up with a headache, weak as hell. I couldn't think at all. I was totally out of order. The whole day was like that. I was extremely emotional. A friend of mine told me that they might be moving in a few months. They live right next door. It made me so sad as if they were leaving the country. That made me think about the consequences of me wanting to leave the country one day. Although I want to very much, the thought of it cuts like a knife. I have to get my used to thought slowly so that when the day comes I won't go into a coma. Being the emotional person I am, no matter how I try I probably won't get used to the thought completely. Anyway back to today. It was a loss of a day for me. It was sad, heartaching, hopeless, dark, lonely, no way out.. every other negative thing you can think about with a major headache as icing on the cake. I was supposed to go to a birthday dinner of a very dear friend of mine but I couldn't because of my headache. I slept for like 4 hours in the evening.
When woke up I decided to treat my self to Mcdonalds. I ordered from the internet and took about one and a half hour to come. Normally it comes like in 20 minutes. I was starving. Unlike pizza places they don't have the "if were late than its free" policy. Anyway I ate it all up and topped it with a chocolate donut.. Did it make me happy? Temporarily yes, but in the log run my conscience is bugging me because I'm extremely careful with what I eat and drink do to health problems. Cheating once in a blue moon isn't gonna kill me..
That was today, its gonna be completely over as soon as I fall asleep. Hopefully tomorrow I'll be back to normal..